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How to make peace with Fear and let Confidence take the lead

How to make peace with Fear and let Confidence take the lead

Lately I have been having a lot of ups and downs emotionally. On the one side is Confidence. I am all in on my hustle and getting my name out there. I am confident that I make something that people like, need, and want.

On the other side is Fear. Fear that even if I try my hardest I will never be successful. Fear that my persistence will never pay off. Fear that I will never realize my dreams, that I will just be another person that lived a life that no one remembers.

Fuck Fear.

What has Fear ever done for me? (Other than keep me from doing stupid shit that would cause bodily harm.)  If you have never read Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert, I highly recommend it. It is because of this book that I have finally been allowed to see that little negative voice in the back of my head for who she is.

Fear is scared. ALWAYS. Fear wants to keep things small. Fear doesn’t want you to try new things, or spread your wings. Fear hates new experiences and it’s in the risks and challenges that we actually live our lives. This is where the memories are made. And really in the end, even if we are not remembered, all WE have are our memories.

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I want to live a life that matters. So I need to ignore Fear.

I want to do something big so that I can look back and know I was present in my life and I didn’t just mark the days. So I tell Fear to chill out.

I want to live through the lows and the challenges so I can fully appreciate the successes. So I tell Fear to hold on tight but to close her eyes.

Fear is ALWAYS going to be there. She doesn’t just go away one day. BUT I think when we hear her it’s ok to acknowledge her and tell her: 

“Hey, thanks for telling me that this is something new. But this is something that matters so we are going to do it anyway.”

Or:

“Last time I listened to you and it didn’t work out the way I wanted, so this time we are going to try something different.”

Or:

“I am glad you are here. It tells me I am about to do something that is important to me, something that will help me grow. But, you need to sit quietly while I do this thing.”

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Fear is loud. Confidence is quiet.

Fear is immediate. Confidence is persistence.

We can’t find or even hear Confidence if we don’t tell Fear to go away.

Confidence is strong. She is that quiet voice that, when given a chance, will surround you and carry you to realize your dreams.

I choose to listen to Confidence today. I choose to tell Fear:

“Thank you for speaking up, but you’re taking up too much room, you are too loud, and it is Confidence's turn to talk today.”

If I listen to Confidence enough times I know anything is possible.

KIT,

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